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” Kindergarten pageants don’t run to speaking parts.“You should have come,” Alice says, showing that she is quite capable of repeating the same speech over and over -- maybe not one anybody else had written.“Mommy has classes on Wednesday.” Claire was repeating herself, too. You did when talking with Alice.“Other mommies don’t go to school. You should have come.”“Other mommies have finished school. I haven’t.”“You should. You should have come.” Finally, though, Alice lies down to sulk herself to sleep and Claire escapes to the living room.She sits on the couch beside Kirk to watch TV. Mostly, though she thinks about the last conversation. Her daughter is so self-centered, so selfish. Sure, Claire’s choices made her finish college one class at a time at night. She could have had an abortion and finished her senior year. That idea, abhorrent back then, was looking more attractive in retrospect the longer Alice whined for not getting everything her way.The speeding car on screen goes. 2. Nothing is worse than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.5. How the Hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?6. Was learning cursive really necessary?7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind-of tired.10. Bad decisions make good stories.11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection ... again.13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to.
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